Stay at home moms go through a world full of emotions the whole day. And then come these nasty remarks from family members or friends. Though they might not mean to offend them, but they definitely are offensive. I have heard way too many remarks ever since I had my son. And here are some common comments that I hear being a stay at home mom, and I really wish I didn’t.
1) Being a stay at home mom, what do you do all day?
It would have been so polite if you had rather asked “ How was your day ?”. I change diapers, cook, clean, tackle tantrums, feed , do laundry and the list gets too long. I end up taking a bath in the evening once my husband is back. So you can imagine how my days really are. I consider myself lucky when I have one hot meal in the whole day. This is what I do all day.
2) Don’t you feel like taking a real job?
Being a stay at home mom is more difficult that my full time job which paid me so well. How can you not call this real? Don’t you think taking care of someone 24 X 7, selflessly, is a job in itself. Plus I don’t get any sick days off.
3) It is great that you can afford staying at home.
I may not be contributing financially but I am making sure that I do not spend recklessly like I did before. I make sure that we save while ordering groceries or buy the things that we need (not like). So that my child learns that every penny saved is a penny earned. It is difficult to live in a house with only one income, but commenting on my family’s financial situation isn’t acceptable.
4) I would get so bored staying at home with my kid.
Bored? My day is never boring. And everyday throws a bigger challenge. There is poop all over the house while I am trying to potty train my kid. And while I am cleaning that, he might like playing with the mud in the plants. This is just one example of how exciting my days are.
5) You must be loving the “alone” time with you child.
I wont deny that I am not. I love the extra cuddles and kisses. But the alone time sometimes looks good, all the time? It gets to the nerves.
6) Seems like you get a year long vacation?
A vacation where you have to work all day long isn’t a vacation. Staying at home with kids isn’t a vacation at all. And if someone thinks it is, they probably didn’t have children of their own.
7) You must be getting so much rest.
I have not slept for more than two hours at a stretch since I became a mom. And day naps have become a dream for me. Do you think I get enough rest?
8) What kind of an example will you set for your child?
That I work hard to keep him comfortable and healthy. And there is his dad who is doing the same. I think we both are setting great examples for him.
9) Won’t your degrees go waste?
On the contrary I am learning new things everyday. I have learnt how to be patient, how to give my 100 percent to my daily chores and the list goes on. I am getting a practical lesson of things I could have learnt in a job.
So if you’re really interested to know about the life of a stay at home mom, don’t ask any of the above questions. Rather, just ask “ how are you doing”.
PS : This post is truly personal and does not aim at judging the working moms. I have a lot of respect for the working moms. The mere reason to write this post was to address the various offensive questions I have dealt.
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